Happy New Year! It’s 2019 which means new resolutions, new goals, and new aspirations to be better versions of ourselves. I know many of us are resolving to eat better, exercise more, save money, and kill bad habits. Now, whether we drop those last twenty pounds, commit to veganism, or create that emergency is yet to be determined. But, maintaining our sexual health and well-being is an easy win and great start to living our best sexual lives in 2019. So, here are five ways to get you started on the road to sexual health and fulfilment. Let’s get to it!
There is nothing like receiving a clean bill of health! If you have not done so, schedule an appointment with a healthcare provider you trust. Make sure to address any sexual and reproductive health concerns you may have. That may mean divulging some of your sexual practices and behavior, but your health is totally worth it. Also, ask you provider how often you need pap smears that check for cervical cancer and be sure to specifically request HIV/STD testing, as these infections are not typically screened for in routine pap and blood tests. And don’t underestimate the importance of routine screenings such as blood pressure, cholesterol, blood sugar, and iron levels. Ailments associated with chronic disease can have huge impact on your sex life.
Our reproductive health and family planning needs change as we navigate our way through life. Those birth control pills you’ve been taking since 16 may not suit your current life 30-something, child-free, jet-setting life. Or you may have a couple of kiddos and are considering shutting down the factory. Or your current method is causing crazy side effects that are interrupting your daily activities. Or you may like to keep things natural and leave things up to chance. Whatever the situation, it’s always good to evaluate your current lifestyle and plans to determine IF, WHEN, and HOW you desire to become a parent. If you only want 1, great! If you want a whole tribe, fine! If you don’t want any,
It’s very hard to live your best sexual life when you’re obsessing over and stalking your ex-bae’s every move on Facebook, Snapchat, and Instagram. The task becomes even more daunting when every single text message, couple selfie, and dick/vag/ass pic is stored in your phone. Not to mention, ex-bae’s new boo is beautiful, handsome, rich, highly-educated, speaks 10 languages, and has traveled to 150 countries. And to add insult to injury, your best friend just got engaged, your brother purchased a new home, your cousin welcomed a new baby, your 8th grade classmate is in Saint-Tropez on a yacht, a random college dropout created a multi-million dollar business, all while you’re sitting on your couch scrolling through your never-ending social media feeds.
You see the rabbit hole? Turn back! Just purge your phone and social media of people and accounts that make you inadequate, unaccomplished, less than, and unworthy. If it’s not adding value, money, happiness, or orgasms, rid yourself of it! If need be, turn off the phone, shut down the computer, do a social media detox, engage in some self-care, and remind yourself of who the hell you are!
We know it’s good practice to thoroughly clean our toys after each and every use. But things happen, especially after mind-blowing, leg shaking orgasms. Taking the time to do a little cleaning helps prevent infections and ensures that our little nightstand buddies bring pleasure for years to come. Make sure to check the packaging to find out the material(s) your toy is made of, as this will determine how it is be cleaned and maintained. Generally, if your toy is:
- Motorized and made of silicone, glass, treated wood, hard (ABS) plastic, treated stone, or stainless steel: a mild soap and damp cloth will do the trick
- Non-motorized and made of silicone, glass, wood, stone, or stainless steel: submerge in boiling water for a few minutes or run them through the dishwasher (without soap). Pay attention to your dishwasher settings.
- Porous materials—ie. thermoplastic rubber and thermoplastic elastomer: cannot be sanitized and can only be cleaned on the surface with mild soap and water– the pores in the toy can still hold bacteria and mildew.
While you’re at it, pick up some long-lasting, rechargeable batteries. There is nothing worse than a dying vibrator when you’re almost at your peak.
Remember that position you’ve been wanting to try? What about that fantasy you’ve been dreaming about? Don’t forget that sexual crush you’ve been harboring for weeks. Whatever is is, write it down and make it happen. When you can clearly see what you desire, you can plan and confidently act on those desires. Now, people will think you’ve lost your mind and may even throw around the words ‘hoe’, ‘slut’, and ‘loose’. But, it is not your job to bear the weight of their expectations and sexual baggage. As long as your actions are safe, consensual, ethical, and legal, there is no shame in having the ‘out-of-this-world’ sexual experiences you desire.